No time for me. I miss that time. It’s time stolen from me. I feel like I felt before: having a partner without the other person truly caring. I’m in this something that doesn’t help me move forward with my life. It’s just eating me, draining me. I wish I was better, I wish I could be there with her. I feel like wasting time, energy. I want to build a life, and I’m not managing. I put myself in harder and harder situations, I make my own life a living hell. I want to get out of this, but there is no easy way out. The easy way out just seems easy but is riddled with its own problems. The hard way is the only way, but I’m tired and very-very lonely. I know I can give — she gave that to me, that knowledge that there is more out there and it’s possible for me to attain it. I’m just not sure how much time it will be, how much I will have to work on myself to get there. To have a life worth living.